Choice of Love
I believe that people have the wrong view of what love is. Some view love as being some kind of feeling, while others believe that "true love" doesn't exist. Why is it so important to know what love really is? One's actions are based on one's beliefs and understandings. If one doesn't know the true definition and acquire the true understanding, then one cannot truly love. People's wrongful actions have left society crippled and unprepared for the future. So what is the true definition of love?
Before one can understand what love is, one must first understand what love is not. Love is not some random feeling that one can "fall into" or "fall out" of. It is not just acting out of how one is feeling towards someone. Statistics show that people in American society are getting divorced at an alarming rate. A child coming from a dysfunctional family has become commonplace. About one-half of the people getting married end up in divorce. This leaves one-half of society's new generation unprepared. I believe that one's wrongful view of love plays a major role in the escalating divorce rate. Before I go on, I'd like to say that divorce is not always wrong. I do believe that the only reasons to get a divorce are infidelity or abandonment. And these reasons are usually the result of one's momentary blindness or abandonment of the real definition of love. Any other "reason" is due to poor choices before marriage, making divorce an inexcusable result or decision. The false definitions leave one with an excuse for divorce. "Why should people have to stay together if they don't love each other anymore?" They act out of selfishness and don't take others into consideration. People are just lazy! No one wants to look at the problems with society because that would mean a lot of work and accepting that one is wrong. I guess pride does come before the fall.
I believe psychiatrists to be some of the smartest people in the world, not because of any degree, but because they are some of the only people who have enough far-sight to see the actual repercussions of a divorce. They are getting rich treating people for what their parents did or didn't do.
How then shall we live? One must first understand what love is. Love is a choice one makes from the knowledge of oneself and therefore a way of life. Every time someone says or does something, one is choosing to love or not to love. Feelings and emotions sometimes get in the way. The choice of acting in true love is acquired free from acting on impulsive emotions. I say "impulsive emotions" because emotions by themselves are not bad. Everyone has emotions. However, emotions are very unpredictable and should not be mistaken for love in its entirety. Based on the climate, company, certain actions, a comment, or what time of the month it is, a person's emotions can go from good to bad in a second. It is just when one acts out of these emotions without thinking that things go wrong. Love is such a specific term that the Greek language gives three words for it. Love involves relating to others and not holding grudges against them for making a mistake. Love is a way of life in which one chooses to see the good in others. One can accept the fact that nobody is perfect. One's decision to love brings about emotions; when emotions and feelings fail, the choice of love is still there to hold things together. Good friends have fights, but they stay and work things out because they love each other. Problems occur when one makes feelings the definition of love.
Why is it so hard to choose to love someone? Why has the definition of love become so distorted? I believe this is due to many reasons. People are scared to love others because they are afraid they will be taken advantage of or they will not be loved back. The reason that the definition has become distorted is the absence of absolute truths and ideas. Hardly anything is "right and wrong" anymore. People have accepted a new system of "better or worse." One needs to learn that love is a way of life, and one either does or one doesn't. There is no in-between.
Love is not a simple choice one makes purely out of emotion or reasoning. One makes a choice based on one's knowledge of oneself. One makes the choice of love with one's whole being: body (emotions and feelings), mind (decision-¬ making), and soul (personal beliefs). So to truly love, one must first truly know oneself.
